Sunday, December 26, 2010

Semester Break

Hello all!

So I have fallen back a bit on posting, but only because I have been so busy working crazy hours and not to mention I'm house sitting for a friend who does not have internet access. But anyhoo...

So the semester ended quite interestingly. I passed my Calc III class with flying colors, (how,I have no idea) and the one class I thought for sure, there was no way I couldn't pass, I didn't. But it's not a prereq for anything and its a lame class so I can take it later on as a filler.

Next semester is going to be tough, however I will be there in Lincoln so it should be a great semester! I have gotten involved with several different clubs or organizations and I got an apartment right across from campus, and have made some friends that are going to help me with my studying.

If this next semester doesn't go well I'm pretty sure I'm going to just give up and switch the major to something else. I'll of course keep up with the blogging as much as I can. ;)

I hope everyone has had a happy holiday and hope everyone has a safe new years!

Thanks for all the support and hope for this semester! I appreciate those who lend advice and follow my blog.

Thanks!


"If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you," that would suffice."

~Meister Eckhart

Friday, December 17, 2010

One Semester Down

Today was my last final...My first semester at UNL is officially over. Next semester will be quite the challenge. Now that I have managed to get a bit more acclimated at the University I hope to be quite a bit more successful in the Spring.

As of right now I have a very full load. A couple Nuclear Online courses, an EE lab, my (hopefully) last math class, and 3 other EE courses. Now after I get my final grades back from this semester that may all change.

I know for sure that I didn't do well on either of the finals I had. :-/ It is a very, very sad story because I studied so hard and worked so hard for my Calculus Exam, and in the end still ended up leaving too much of the exam blank. I believe for next semester I will go to the testing center to see if I can get more time for exams and or atleast be able to take the exam in an office... Another room other than where there are a million other people.

So now that I have this incredible weight bearing down on me while I wait for the results of the first (virtually horrible) semester, I will be working my ass off through the entire break. I am working so many hours, and my supervisor doesn't seem to care at all that they are running me completely ragged. I will be finding a new job soon anyways, again, hopefully. I just need to find one where I may move laterally in pay and benefits in Lincoln. Only then will life be as needed for this whole school thing to truly work out well.

Over the break I am going to be doing TONS of reading too... I already have one of my EE books, used for two classes, and my differential equations book. Hopefully this will help things go much smoother next semester. One of the EE classes I dropped this semester so I am just retaking it. I dropped it pretty late in the semester too so hopefully what I did attain from it will help.

The next couple weeks are going to be crazy... I hope everyone has a safe and happy Holiday!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Engineers Without Borders...

So I have recently become a member of the UNL- Engineers Without Borders Chapter! It is an amazing organization that is part of the Engineers Without Borders-USA group. We are currently looking into developing renewable energy projects and clean water filtration systems down in Kianjavato, Madagascar.

The Group is trying to raise money for the trip and supplies needed to help install the solar panels in the school houses that will provide power for a light and fan in each one. Most of the villages down there do not have electricity of any form and do not have safe water to drink, cook, or even bathe in. We hope to help reduce the high risk water issues with the filtration system.

From what I can see, going to the meetings (General as well as committee), everyone is so intensely committed to making a difference for these people! Some went down to do assessment research on needs and wants of the locals of the area. Power and fresh water are the two largest needs.

I am so incredibly excited to be apart of the group! I have applied to be one of the students that go down this next May 2011 to Kianjavato, Madagascar. I can't wait to begin making a difference in people's lives.

DONATE TO THE UNIVERSITY OF NEBRASKA CHAPTER OF ENGINEERS WITHOUT BORDERS-USA and get a boost to your donation with a match from EWB-USA’s corporate sponsors!


We are raising money for our efforts to help provide clean drinking water and power for lights in the schools in Kianjavato, Madagascar. A donation of $10 will pay for one day of translator services, $50 will pay for one day of car rental and driver, $100 will pay for a biosand filter to provide clean water for a household, $1000 will provide a solar system to provide light for a classroom, and $5000 will provide a solar system to power a computer for a school. EWB-USA in partnership with their corporate sponsors (Google, Tuner Construction, CDM and CH2MHill) will match your donation to our chapter with a one-for-one match from now until the end of December 2010.

Here’s what you need to do to help us improve the lives of the people of Kianjavato, Madagascar!

1. Type in URL into web address bar: https://ewb-usa.org/2010giving/
2. If there is a problem with the site’s security certificate, ignore the comment and click Continue to the site anyway.
3. Fill out Contributor Information on the left hand side of the web page.
4. Fill out amount of contribution as well as credit card information.
5. Scroll down and in the right column you will see a heading called Allocation. IMPORTANT: Type in University of Nebraska in the information bar under the heading Allocation. If this is not done, the University of Nebraska will not receive the donation!
6. Click Process Contribution.
7. If a comment appears stating that the address you have entered does not match the address registered with your bank, ignore it—your order has been processed! DO NOT re-click Process Contribution. If you do, your donation will be resubmitted and your account will be charged again.

If you have questions or would like more information, please contact Devor O’Connor, Fundraising Chair for the EWB-USA NU Student Chapter at doconnor@huskers.unl.edu.




Saturday, December 4, 2010

Almost there!

So yesterday was the end of an incredibly gruelly week. I had my last chapter exam in my Calculus III class over the course of Thursday and Friday. Thursday's part of the exam I think went about as well as any other exam has gone thus far... I might have gotten half of it right. Friday's test was rediculous. I left quite a bit of it blank and the parts I did manage to get anything down on the paper was all complete fabrication of absolutely nothing... It just did not go well at all. :-/

Thursday was an incredibly tough day as well. I think the stress of the semester ending, of my exam that day and Friday, and probably a little bit of work and family issues as well. I had a complete melt down. I'm sure all the time wasted crying and sleeping could have been better spent studying for my test. I should have done better than I did on the exam Friday. This entire week has just been incredibly long and heartbreaking. This entire semester and better yet year have been incredibly tough. I am just ready for everything to be over... I'd like to get back to my adult life of just work and independence.

This next week is "dead week" at the University. I am going to be spending quite a lot of time studying. I am so lucky I only have two finals.

So on the 15th I am going to pick up the keys to my new apartment. I will then spend the next seven days cleaning, painting, and making it the cutest little hole in the wall you can imagine. :D I am super excited to just hide out away from everything and everyone. It will be nice to be back to me. I definitely lost myself somehow this past year so I will definitely be doing some grounding and recoverying.

I found a great organization that does some great work for people down in Uganda, Africa. Everyone should check this site out! There is a part called SUUBI, which offers various merchandise for sale that is uniquely hand made from women down in Uganda. You must just check out the site and read all about it. It's an incredible organization...

http://lightgivesheat.org/



Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Not Running Away... Just Moving On

So yesterday I signed the lease to my new apartment in Lincoln. It is a great little place just across the street from the university. I am pretty excited about it. I get my keys soon and will be painting and cleaning for a couple weeks before I actually move anything over there.

I have come to the realization that someone I has hoping was "the one" can't possibly be. For one thing, he doesn't even want to be with me. Lol, that is a pretty good indicator that he isn't "the one". I have deleted pretty much everything that has to do with him out of my phone and computer. Hopefully this will help me forget about him. It was a short period of time we were together, but it was just so emotionally intense for me it is impossible to explain. I don't think I have even been so ridiculously emotionally attached to anyone like that before. Since I am moving this will help tremendously. I actually decided to move after it was clear we were never going to be more than friends... We can't even really be real friends considering the fact he never wants to even see me or talk to me. Text or fb chatting is what it has all come down to now. Yep, definitely time to drop it. Wow, there ya go, poured my heart out and now everyone knows just how pathetic I really am. :P

so back to the apartment.... It is an extremely small space, but it has potential. I have great painting plans for it. This will be the first apartment I will actually paint and take the time to fix up. Any previous apartments I never really had pictures hung or much decor set up. This should be fun.

I have my Spring classes set up. I will be taking three engineering courses, 1 lab, 1 math course (hopefully the last...), and 2 online nuclear engineering courses. It should be interesting. Hopefully being so close to campus and in my own little place will help with focus and studying.

I have been reading more and more into meditation. I have been able to calm myself and stay grounded. It helps a lot. When I have my own place I will be able to take more time to relax, meditate, and breathe. There is just something about where I am now that is suffocating. A lot of things in my life have not gone how I hoped. I have dealt with them in one way or another. Recently things pretty much hit the fan. My stress levels have been horribly high and I have put so much pressure on myself that I completely failed myself and everyone else...

This entire year has been so hard. I hope next year and the year after fly by pleasantly. I'm not sure how my tolerance for failure will hold up if there is ever a repeat of this year. And I am not just talking about school. This includes friendships, relationships, work, everything! I have lost 2.5 friends this year... It has been a year of heartache. I just don't think I'll be able to make it through another year of so much of it again.

I hope everyone has a nice holiday season. I hope the New Year brings happiness to everyone. I hope the world becomes a better place tomorrow, not one anyone dreads to be in...

To New Beginnings! To the possibility of love, hope, compassion, and forgiveness!

Monday, November 29, 2010

First Day Back After the Break

Today began great! I got some sleep last night! :D After this past crazy weekend, it was definitely needed! Classes resumed after the Thanksgiving break. I missed my morning class, but got my homework for it turned in. Calculus this after noon was pretty good, interesting as usual...

After my calculus class my friend and I had planned to study because we have our last chapter exam for calculus Thursday and Friday. I had to go see the apartment that was still available (I missed out on my cute little one with the wooden floors :'( ) and turn in the application for it, so she went with me.

While we were waiting to check out the apartment we went to grab a bite to eat at Panara Bread, which is just across the street. I ate half of a panini and then we headed over to meet L, the leasing agent. She showed me the apartment, up on the 4th floor. It had the best carpet of all the others I had seen previously. I went ahead and said that's the one I'll take. After we were done there we drove to the management office. It was just around the corner and down a few blocks, not too far. While I was sitting there filling out the application there was so much going on, I was pretty close to saying forget it! People who were sitting in an office close by had all kinds of things to say about people who were calling... The guy who said, "If you have any questions just let me know." Seemed quite irritated and in a hurry to get away when I did actually have a couple questions... It was quite the experience. I had never been in a place like that before. They just didn't seem like any of the property management places I have ever worked for or been to in the past. Oh well, I desperately need to get away from here so I didn't let it all get to me too bad.

After I finished my application for the apartment we headed back to campus to study. We both still had our food from Panara because we didn't have time to eat at all. We sat down in one of the lounges of the Engineering building and began doing calculus problems. It is pretty nice working with my friend, Kay because she is patient and understanding when explaining things I don't quite get. There are also somethings that she may not get right away that I can explain to her. This helps I think both of us when we work together through problems. After studying for a few hours we decided we needed some coffee! We went over to the student union, bought some Starbucks, then got right back to work on Calculus. We only got half of the section done though :-/. We will do much more tomorrow. I completely lost focus and had to just call it a night. I will read tonight before I go to bed so hopefully tomorrow we can get more done.

I don't really remember much of the drive home... I was pretty tired from the long day of studying, extremely excited about my apartment so close to campus, and trying to go over calculus stuff in my head the entire drive. When I got back into town I was so excited to tell someone about my apartment! I text one of my best friends to see if he wanted to go to Ihop, but he had already eaten... So I just told him via text, which wasn't that exciting then. As soon as I got home I text another friend to see if he was talkable, thought this time I'd just call and tell someone myself so my excitement wasn't dulled... That didn't go so well, I just ended up making him mad so now he won't talk to me at all :'(... (Not surprising since he took something I text sarcastically seriously.... Which had it been another day and I was actually upset/depressed, I could have said it seriously, but that definitely wasn't the case tonight.) Anyways, apparently he wasn't in a good mood. Oh well.. So anyways, I just told my dad. He is sick though, and I don't think he really cares so all my excitement has completely been flushed down the drain... And people wonder why I am cynical. What's the point when you have no one to share anything with??

So now I am going to just read my Calculus book until I fall asleep. Tomorrow is a new day, hopefully will be a much better day (from beginning to end)! I have a lunch date, then off to Lincoln to study more for my test with my friend, and then to the UNL basketball game! :D I am super excited about that!! Another friend of mine who is also a basketball fan and player is going to go with me! I can't wait! Then maybe to B-Dubbs for wings?? The Engineers without Boarders has a fundraiser going on there where if you eat there 10% of the bill will go towards the group! I am joining the EWB-UNL group too so I am definitely going to try to go support them!

Things will be looking up again soon enough. I will be able to move forward and get over people as soon as I get out of here and I can not wait.

"There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving... and that's your own self."

Friday, November 26, 2010

Working Weekend

So I don't have much of a comment about Thanksgiving. However, I hope everyone enjoyed their Turkey Day! Mine was interesting to say the absolute least...

This morning it was up bright and early to return to work. I am here until 11p and then back in the morning at 7 a.m. again. I am working a double tomorrow as well. Sunday I also work 7a-11p. I hope this goes by fast. Though I gladly cover for everyone, I am not all that excited about not being able to study this weekend.

I have a Calculus test Thursday and Friday this next week. I have tons of studying and homework to do in order to do well. This is our last chapter exam before our final. I also have an extra credit project I need to begin and finish as soon as possible. Monday I am pretty excited because I am going to put down a deposit and application for my new apartment (hopefully). I am just ready to be back out on my own again. Not that I don't appreciate my father for allowing me to stay with them while I am in school, I will just do much better in my own space.

I have began practicing/attempting the Chakra meditation. I will work on each chakra center, one at a time until I am able to successfully meditate and balance all of them. One more thing to add to the benefits list of having my own place! :) Though I did feel a bit more centered after, I definitely have a ways to go in order for it to have the positive and lasting effects it should. I am pretty excited about it. I was speaking with my brother about it, and he has some books that I will be able to borrow in order to learn and research more about the Chakra as well as other various forms of meditation.

So back to school stuff... I have tons of studying to do for Thursday and Friday's test. I need to get the motor I have been building done finally by Friday. I have homework due Monday, which I forgot :0... Ooops, guess I'll get that done tonight. One of my very few friends here in Omaha is moving to Kansas next week too. I am prety bummed. Oh well, I guess I'm moving to Lincoln now so that wont be so bad.. I think I'll be closer to him anyways. On top of all that, I have my very last Rotaract meeting of the year Wednesday evening. So next week is rather busy!

I hope everyone has a fabulous weekend and had a nice holiday break! I'm sure I'm forgetting things that will pop up beginning Monday so I will definitely keep everyone posted!

"A human being is a part of a whole, called by us 'universe', a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest... a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty."

-Albert Einstein