A little peek inside

So today is Saturday. This usually means a lot to most people. It’s the weekend! This is the time one has to relax, enjoy time with family and friends, and not have to worry about work. Most people here in Nebraska will be either traveling to Lincoln for the Nebraska vs. Missouri football game or preparing for adventurous party or gathering at home to watch the game. I, on the other hand, am at work. Though I will not complain about it today because:
1. Working the weekends pays my bills
2. I need to pay bills
3. For the first time, in a long time, I do not have- to return tonight to work the overnight shift!
I have very exciting plans to see the local Symphony Orchestra Perform tonight, playing music of an incredible musician, Michael Jackson. I am so excited! Normally I pick up the night shift because actually doing something and making plans on the weekends is never on the books. I don't have too many friends I actually hang out with, so working usually makes sense to fill up my time. If I'm going to do nothing, might as well be paid, right?

So today, because I am just ecstatic about not having to rush home to sleep in preparation of the night shift, I plan on going to Whole Foods and picking up some yummy frozen yogurt for later after the concert, then I'll make a drive by of the venue I will be watching the concert at this evening, then I'll probably take a nap.

So this past week has pretty much become a blur. It was a bit rough in the beginning. By the end of the week I was so exhausted. I work every other Friday evening. I actually attend school about an hour away from where I live and work at this moment in time. So yesterday was a crazy day: Class... Class... Drive (rush)... Work. This would normally be quite alright, but I am still trying to get over this sickness I've had for the past two weeks. I won't go into details about how work actually went last night. I'll just express how happy I am to have gotten through it without walking out in the middle of it.

So I have been told that I am a cynical person. Though I don't believe that I am naturally this way, I tend to vocalize my misfortune to certain people (so I can see how those particular individuals may think this about me). I don't necessarily just see the bad in EVERYTHING, I see all sides of it all. My rose colored glasses fell off and broke a long time ago. When life has taken as many wrong way turns as mine has, its hard not to look out for all possible outcomes. I don't really think I'm cynical, most people will say I am upbeat and positive all the time! It’s funny that I never realized how differently so many people may view me. But this is life, right? Everyone is different, and obviously I keep my distance with most people, only truly letting in very few. Hmmm, so maybe I am secretly cynical, and I just hide it well from most of the world??

I like to believe I am an honest person. I have no qualms about expressing my opinion on things. I have learned to hold my tongue in certain situations and with certain people (This lesson coming either just in time or a little too late in some situations). I am pretty open-minded. I try to see from everyone's viewpoint, as well as understand their reasoning behind their actions. I try my hardest not to judge as I am by no means perfect in anyway, and I try to keep this in mind.

I have worked in customer service, in one form or the other, since I have began working. I have lived and worked from a tiny town in Texas to a larger city in Texas, to Las Vegas, NV, to another city here in Nebraska. I have met so many different people from all over the world, all of them coming from different backgrounds, with different cultures, beliefs, and traditions. I have learned to respect everyone I cross paths with. You never know when you might meet someone who will make a difference in your life. By that statement I don't mean, "What can I get or gain from knowing or being nice to this person?". I mean, "What might I learn from this person, or what might they learn from me?" I have watched situations where it was like Three's Company, and there was this crazy misunderstanding. I have watched people react to horrible news about their loved ones. I have watched people react to good news regarding their job, friends, family, and even other strangers. Being a part of these situations I learn something about people all the time. Composure, respect, understanding, and compassion are things I learn from people who cross my path. It’s amazing what you are able to observe and absorb from just stepping outside and watching.

Everyone is human. Everyone has feelings, concerns, and unique circumstances. These are things that we are taught growing up, but they seem to be grouped with the lessons about alcohol, drugs, and sex. By this I mean, as soon as junior high hits, they go out the window! I must admit there was a time in my life where I took the need to be honest a bit too literally and used it in a hateful way. I deeply regret this because it caused a lot of hurt feelings, which were completely unnecessary. Basically I learned my lesson long ago. I wish everyone else learned this back in junior high. It’s sad because there really are so many people who judge and don't give another human a second thought. There is a quote which I love and try to always keep in mind while dealing with other people.

"In fact, everything we encounter in this world with our six senses is an inkblot test.
You see what you are thinking and feeling, seldom what you are looking at."
-Shiqin

It’s incredible how perception can change your understanding and willingness to be compassionate of others. Keeping an open mind without judgement is always a goal when dealing with every situation or individual I come across. I can only hope this will one day become epidemic.